Sunday, 25 September 2011

No Ordinary Interview

The Hogwarts crest : "Never Tickle a  Sleeping Dragon"
Hi! Ok, before I post my awesome story (if I say so myself ;P) I have some news from the inner depths of my brain. it is now offical - I'm addicted to Harry Potter! To those you who haven't seen the films, or read the books, Harry Potter is quite possibly the most amazing series of book/films on the planet!! It's just so awesome!! I've read the last three books in under a week and now, Harry Potter is under my skin. I can't stop thinking about it! If anyone has a cure, I would be grateful ;)

Anyway, Harry Potter is part of the inspiration for this story. Don't worry if you don't like HP - it has a minimal part in the story! I hope you enjoy the story! It's quite long, so be ready!

No Ordinary Interview

Julie sat nervously on the couch, clutching at her CV. Her normally straight blonde hair was ruffled and her red dress sat awkwardly on her hips, as if it didn’t fit her well. Her blue eyes, huge and wide, darted around the room, hovering for a few seconds over the door, and her small frame shook with the anticipation of what was ahead. Her very first job interview! It would have made anyone nervous, but Julie had much more at stake – she was asking for a job position in the government. It was lowly work, something to do with the Foreign Affairs secretary, but, even so, it was a big step in the world. Julie sat up straighter in her seat. She had always been a model student, getting the best results in exams, becoming a prefect, going into University well before her peers. She was a show-in for the job, and she knew it. Once she was in, she was in forever, moving slowly up the rungs of the government. This was her big break into the world, her chance to become a household name, her chance to be known in the world...

“Julie Yaxley?” Julie glanced up and immediately leapt to her feet.

“Th-that’s me,” she stuttered, smiling weakly at the frail looking woman that shouted her name.

The woman studied her for a moment and then said sharply, “Follow me.”  She turned on her heel and pushed open the door, not bothering to hold it open for her guest. Julie, surprised by the rudeness, hurried after her, emerging in a long hallway that stretched as far the eye could see. It was brightly lit and colourful, but at the same time dark and chilly. Julie kept her eyes pinned on the woman in front of her, on the pale blue of her dress and the tapping of her high heels.

The woman suddenly stopped and pointed at a door. “That’s you in there,” she said gruffly. Julie noticed that there was hair growing from her upper lip.  Ignoring it, Julie looked at the door. It was made of dark wood and the plaque on it was faded and dusty. She could just make out the words :

Anne Mairs
                                          Foreign Affairs          



“O-ok...” Julie muttered but the woman was already gone, scurrying down the hallway. Julie took a deep breath and pushed open the door.

The inside of the room was panelled with wood and there was a large, black desk sitting by the miniscule window,  sandwiched between two black chairs. The desk was cluttered with bits of paper and pens and pencils, many of which lay on the floor in disarray.

“Hello! You must be Julie! I apologize for Miss Davidson...it’s nearing the end of her moon cycle and we all know what that means!” Julie started and blinked. There was a woman sitting behind the desk dressed in a navy business suit. Her wavy brown hair was pulled tightly into a bun and her nails were painted a shocking hot pink. Julie nodded dumbly and sat down in the other chair. Her head was reeling. That chair had been empty a few minutes before. How had the woman...?

“Well, I’m Anne Mairs, head of Foreign Affairs at the moment. And I take it you’re applying for the secretary position?”

Julie snapped out of her head and replied, “Yes, yes, that’s me.” She smiled and handed over her CV. “I’m sure you’ll find everything to your liking.”

Anne grabbed the CV and quickly rifled through it, pausing for no longer than a second on each page. When she had finished, she sat it down on her desk, just another bit of paper amongst millions.

“Aren’t you going to read that a bit more...thoroughly?” Julie asked, a hint of annoyance in her voice. Anne merely smiled and clasped her hands.

“No, dear, I think that will suffice.” She smiled again. “Ok, let’s gets started shall we!” She leaned forward and grasped a bit of paper and a pen. “Ok, what makes you think I should give you this job? What do you have to offer?”

Julie was ready for this and she confidently parroted the answer her and her mum had practiced. She paused for a few seconds, waiting patiently for Anne’s pen to stop scratching on the paper and then she leaned back slightly in her seat. She was still nervous but the butterflies in her stomach had flown away and she was positive that her answer was perfect. After all, her and her mum had practiced for months. When she glanced up, however, Anne looked unimpressed. Her face was drawn, the smile wiped clean from her mouth. She sighed and sat her pen down on the table.

“Ok, Julie...I’m not going to lie, that was a fake answer and you know it. You don’t mean any of those things – you just want to get a job in the government to show that you’re capable of doing so.” She gently placed her hand on Julie’s wrist, who was staring at her. How could she, this strange woman, know what she wanted? 

Anne continued, “It’s ok. I understand.” She suddenly picked the pen back up and leaned back in her seat. 
“Anyway, on with the show! Second Question –How do you feel about working with vampires?”

Julie almost fell of her seat. “V-vamp-vampires?” she spluttered. Anne beamed at her.

“Yes, vampires! Quite a lively bunch – they’re not the type to turn down a good party! They make up most of the Romanian and Czech Republican governments, you know. You wouldn’t have guessed – they look normal and are very well behaved. It’s only when they get hungry that they...you know...” She mined biting and then said cheerfully, “Yes, we need quite a few people to understand them, their English is terrible, you see. This job requires a fair amount of skill with vampires. So, what is your answer?”

Julie stared at her. “Are you joking? Are you kidding me on?”

“No, no, not at all!” Anne lowered her voice. “I can see that you’re in shock, it’s not much of a surprise really - not many people know about the vampires. Do you want me to move onto the next question?” Julie nodded and closed her eyes. Vampires? Was she serious? Julie massaged her head and took a deep breath before opening her eyes.

“Ok,” she said shakily. “I’m ready.”

“Ok then. How do you feel about werewolves?”

Julie nearly screamed.  Werewolves, vampires? What the hell was this woman on? “Look,” she said angrily.“I don’t care about vampires or unicorns or whatever you’re on about – if you’re having a laugh then you aren't very funny!”

Anne just smiled and said dreamily, “Werewolves and vampires, dear – unicorns are another matter all together! We leave them to the U.N. Now, werewolves. I’m sure you have already realised that we have one on staff today but-”

“What?” Julie screamed.

“Miss Davidson, of course! The woman that brought you to my office!” She laughed. “What did you think I meant when I said ‘moon cycle’!” Anne burst into to peals of laughter and started banging her fist on the desk.

This was too much for Julie. “That’s it!” she cried. “I’m leaving!”  She grabbed her CV off the desk and marched dramatically to the door. Anne didn’t appear to hear her; she was still laughing like a lunatic. Julie pushed the door open and with one last glower, she stormed off down the hall.

By the time Anne had stopped laughing, Julie was long gone. Anne was slightly disappointed – she seemed like quite a good candidate. Sighing, she yelled out into the hall. “Miss Davidson, can you get me the next job applicant please? Thanks!” She heard the gentle patter of the werewolf’s shoes disappearing down the hall into the office. Anne sighed again. Julie was the fifth applicant that had stormed out – the other two had cried and had to be taken away by their significant other, which was a shame, as they’d all been very good up until the vampire question. Suddenly, she could hear Miss Davidson’s voice saying “That’s you in there.” There was a small murmur and the door opened. 

“Hello, you must be Emily. I’m Anne Mairs. Will you take a seat?”

6 comments:

Lily;) said...

That is a wonderful story! Hehe I love the little bits of humor- your an awesome sauce writer! I can't write to save my life.. lol :D But I love reading especially your short stories!

Zoe Crook said...

Fab story, your writing is brilliant! I love Harry Potter too, it is amazingggg :D

Jenni said...

Thanks :)

Rose said...

HILARIOUS. and you said you couldnt write funny light-hearted stuff. pfft.
also, i have a cure for your HP obsession: all you have to do is read all stephenie mayer's books onebyone over and over - you'll soon forget everything you ever learned in your life because you'll be smashing your head off the wall and screaming "WHYYY WHYYY WHYYYY?????????"

Jenni said...

Good advice Rose.. but I think I'll pass :P

Veela Cat said...

Oooh, that's really good! If I found this at the library, I would get it.