Thursday, 9 June 2011

3rd year...-.-

Hi! I am officially in 3rd's rubbish. The timetables are a mess (60 pupils getting the same teacher for Modern Studies!) and most of my classes are hard and I don't get to see any of my friends :( And the worst part is that I have another 2 years before I can change classes again! It's so annoying and frustrating! >:( Luckily, I'm getting the chance to change Physics to Graphic Communication - Yey! So I guess it's not all bad....
Anyway, I have decided to continue with my book "Bulldogs Bite", about a girl who runs away from home and joins a street gang (No copying!) I started writing it in S1 and I stopped writing it in very early S2, so I'm only on Chp 6. I read through it again for the first time in months and I have to admit, I was a terrible writer in S1! My writing style now consists of adverbs and commas - back then it was 'buts' and 'because'. It sounds so childish, so I'm re-writing the whole 6 chapters again, from start to finish, and, hopefully, I might be able to finish it this time! I've decided to give you an excerpt from the original copy though, just so you can see how bad it was :P

Lucy has run away from home and is sleeping on the streets on London. This is her meeting the other main character.

I woke up with a start. The sun was lighting up the sky and a bird tweeted somewhere outside my sleeping place. But something didn't seem quite right. I crawled hastily up out of my sleeping bag. I wandered outside and looked at the world. There wasn't much to see. The bridge I had chosen was in a park, so there were a lot of trees, all of which were swaying in the gentle breeze. I yawned as I looked around. I turned to go get my stuff and was surprised to see a girl about my age standing behind me. Before I could take in what she looked like she whispered “Scruffs, go fetch.”
A dog came charging up to me. But this dog was far from cute. It was showing its sharp little teeth and one of its ears was missing. I lunged at me and forced me to the ground. The fierce-some dog barked in my face and began ripping my clothes apart. “Help!” I said to the girl, who was grinning ear to ear. “Call him off please,” I begged.
“Scruffs, come here,” she said. The little dog obeyed her immediately. I scrambled to my feet and was getting ready to run away when the girl spoke to me again. “What you doing here?” she asked threateningly. “Well?”
I was speechless. My mouth began to moved but no words came out. I looked at the girl who was still staring at me, waiting for an answer. She was scruffy, her clothes torn and her brown hair messy and wild. She was wearing a pair of dirty jeans and a red, torn jumper.  Her piercing green eyes shot through me like daggers when I looked at them so I decided not to make eye contact. She had a scar across her cheek, disfiguring her face. There was a pair of dirty Nikes on her feet and I noticed that she wasn’t wearing socks. She was obviously a street kid. The dog was still at her side, growling and snarling. It was brown and white and seemed to be a cross between an English bull dog and a beagle. It looked up at its master, who continued to stare at me with her venomous eyes.
“What are you doing here?” the girl repeated.
“I-I r-ran away f-from h-h-home,” I stuttered quietly. The girl looked at me quizzically, her head tilted to the side. But she still had her venomous eyes focused on me. “I-I-I ended u-up-p here...” I continued, terrified, but the girl raised her hand to stop me. She glanced down at her dog and then she did something I had never expected. She laughed!
“Look what we’ve got here Scruffs!” the girl laughed. I giggled nervously, unsure of what she meant. I was more than surprised at the girl’s quick change in mood. “I’m Jai,” the girl said shaking my hand and lifting me to my feet. “And you’ve already met Scruffs.” The little dog turned its head sideways and stuck its tongue out. I laughed at Scruffs expression before turning to face the girl again. “I’m Lucy,” I said.
“Come with me,” Jai said grabbing my arm.
“I need to get my stuff,” I told her, glancing back at the bridge where my stuff was.
“No bother,” Jai replied. “Scruffs, guard the bags,” She said to her dog, pointing to the bridge. He ran off under the bridge. Jai looked at me again, but her eyes were full of happiness and friendship instead of poison. I smiled at her and she ran off, out of the park and into the streets of London.
I sprinted through after Jai, my feet pounding off the pavement. She sped through the streets, her brown hair bouncing off her shoulders. I raced through the city but I was finding it difficult to keep up with her. She would take a sharp right turn but by the time I turned the corner she would be halfway down the street. That didn’t stop me from laughing though. I hadn’t been this happy in years. As I ran, I felt my grin spread all over my face and after a while my face hurt from smiling too much. But I couldn’t stop. I was too happy, I was joyous, I was floating on air, filled with adrenaline and joy and excitement. My heart pounded and I was sweating but I didn’t care. I was following a complete stranger but I didn’t care. I should be terrified, I thought. But instead of running as fast as I could in the other direction, I closed my eyes and let my joy radiate from me. I let loose and allowed myself to be carefree for the first time in my life.

As I said, it's not very good! I hope you enjoyed it anyway though :) I'll see you on Sunday!

1 comment:

Rose said...

wtf? its not rubbish!! <3 it! xxx